YOUR MIND CAN MAKE YOU FEEL MORE SICK THAN YOU REALLY ARE!

Last Sunday, I woke up screaming, in a state of utter shock. I had accidently looked at my fingers; the nails had all turned blue. They looked like some dead corpse's fingers - weird and scary! I pinched myself to check if I was alive. "Ounch!" The pinch really hurt, so I was alive. So, why did all my finger nails turn blue? I didn't remember feeling unwell the night before. I had been hale and hearty for quite a long time now. I looked at my nails again and again. They freaked me out totally. I had nail-polish on my toes, but I assumed they must've turned blue as well. Well, finger and toe nails grow simultaneously after all, don't they?

What was wrong with me? I kept wondering. I got up and went to the wash-basin and tried to wash my fingers with soap. I lathered it up, but my nails still remained blue after I washed off the soapy lather. Now, I was really alarmed. I was all alone and didn't want anything to happen to me. With some hostile neighbours around, it wasn't the best time or place to fall sick. I suddenly felt very lonely. If I died, nobody would ever find out. I may just decay in my flat, and when the stench of my decayed body became unbearable, my neighbours may then dump it in the garbage bin or some graveyard. Well, all types of scary uneasy thoughts were entering my mind in full speed.

I had read somewhere that, if your eye-balls or nails changed colour ( even urine ), then something might be terribly wrong. And you should immediately seek professional help. Eye-balls should never turn yellow and nails, never blue. I checked my eye-balls, they were okay. Only my fingers looked creepy as hell. I didn't know any doctors nearby, that was another worry. I've never been the type to run to doctors, so suddenly I regretted it. Maybe, if I visited doctors in the past, I'd have known whom to go to and seek advice. But now I was in a clueless limbo.

Internet! Google! I suddenly remembered. I could atleast find out my ailment via Google. After all, Google was the Baap of all knowledge, wasn't it? It'd have all the answers. So, quickly I opened my laptop and frantically started to type phrases into google-search, like - why my fingers nails have turned blue, which diseases make nails dis-colour etc etc ( see an example - here ). I started clicking all the links and images that came up.
Cyanosis - was the name of the disease, I found out. It was the main reason for nails turning blue, along with extreme cold temperatures. Bombay is hot as it is, so it had to be Cyanosis! This disease could lead to severe heart problems, and may get fatal too. I went numb with all the information. I further researched about 'cyanosis' - that said, it happens when there's not enough oxygen flow in blood & low haemoglobin.

Reading all these, I really started feeling unwell. I felt I could not breath properly and my racing heart was starting to pain as well. I started feeling uncomfortable and sweated profusely. I opened all windows to let in as much fresh oxygen possible, then tried doing anulom-vilom pranayam, deep breathing exercise - infact everything I could, to let oxygen into my blood. I also made a mental note to buy a haemoglobin syrup that evening, so that my blood turns red again. I was really panicky. I felt suffocated, even though all the windows were wide open. I felt my death was near. My condition was worsening by the minute. Strange - before I googled, I didn't feel this sick as I was suddenly feeling ( even though my nails had turned blue earlier ). Are my days numbered now or perhaps only few hours left?

I tried to recollect everything that I could've perhaps done differently, now that there was so little time left. I wanted to say sorry to all those whom I unknowingly hurt. I'll die young; my mind was preparing me. Maybe I won't be able to see my mother too, as she lived in another city. I felt really hopeless. I'd die any moment now. Atlast, I surrendered to my fate. Maybe, I'll die that day itself. It certainly felt that way, considering the way my heart had started to pain as though I'd have a heart attack any moment, plus my difficulty in breathing. I was literally gasping for air.

Feeling weak, I sat down in my bed and slowly tried lying down; preparing to die. I should just let it happen smoothly and not struggle much, I thought. So, I patiently waited for death to come and swallow me up. Maybe, I should've dressed something better if this was my last day on earth. I looked at the blue nightie that I was wearing. I hardly wore it, even though it was brand new. Infact, only the evening before, I had taken it out from my cupboard to wear. It was blue, I looked at it. Well, no time to change now. What's the use, I'd die anyway.

BLUE! I suddenly sat up. My nightie was blue! And my finger nails had also turned blue that day. I had never worn that nightie before. And my nails had never become blue either, before that day. Was there some connection? Since it was new, I had never washed it before. I jumped up from bed, took off the nightie and dashed to my bathroom. I put the nightie in a bucket and filled it with water. Even before I touched the cloth, to my amazement, the water had turned blue. The nightie bled colour! Oh my! It was the colour of the nightie that had got smudged in my nails. I finally realized. And suddenly, I felt good too. All my sickness mysteriously vanished as well. I was feeling fit as a fiddle.

It was my worrying mind that nearly drove me into believing that I'd die, that day. Whoah man! What a day it was. Unbelievable! Now you can be sure 99% of our sickness is nothing but mumbo-jumbo creation of our mind, cos' your mind can make you feel more sick than you really are! ;-)


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