HORROR JOURNEY

When we write anything about the army, we generally have to be all patriotic. We have to say good things about them as they protect our borders. We have to behave extra patriotic at the mention of our armed forces. And why not! They do protect our land, and us, and often are ready to sacrifice their lives in duty for us. While we live in the comfort of our homes, army-men endure harsh conditions to keep us safe. So, it is our duty to respect them in turn, to show our gratitude.
If we are to write anything about them, we should be extra cautious that our content is accurate and honest; because the whole country looks up to them, and admires them. So, when a Billion people's emotions are attached with the army, we gotta be careful about what we write so as to not hurt anyone's feelings & emotions.

I respect the army too. I salute its achievements and look up to them as well. But the growing number of rumours, of misconduct, by army-men on civilians, and the various cases of human rights violations allegedly done against them by army-men does disturb my mind. I don't want to believe them yet the haunting images of various manipuri women, all naked, protesting by holding placards in their hands with 'Indian army rapes us!' written on the banners and placards, does rattle my mind.
Those women would not go to such an extreme step of stripping themselves and protesting in that manner against the army, unless, there was some truth to the allegations.

Who can forget the iron-lady, Irom Sharmila who has been fasting for the last 11+ years protesting against the black laws imposed in her state that gives the army a free hand to do anything at will? 'Killing or Raping' innocent civilians, without being held accountable. Many manipuri women have been raped, famous case being the one that of 'manorama'. Such black-laws exists in the Kashmir valley too, which has seen a violent blood-bath for the last 22+ years. Reportedly 1lakh+ civilians has lost their lives; either due to terrorist attacks, or mostly due to the black-laws of the army who used to shoot down anyone ( mostly during 1989-1998 period ), who would come onto the streets to protest.

Thus, if anyone protested such civilian killings, more innocents would lose their lives. It has been a bloody cycle of death for over two decades. Not to mention, hundreds of kashmiri women being raped and molested in hordes as well.

There is also a town 'dardpora' in kashmir, where every single woman living there is a widow, with all their husbands having died mostly facing the army bullets. Now Kashmir or NE are known disturbed areas infested with insurgency and terrorists, hence, existence of the black-laws are understandable especially with foreign elements brainwashing the local youths and funding the insurgent movements.
However, what is not understandable is that those army men who are at fault of having committed human rights violation often go unpunished. That's certainly not acceptable.

They are present in those places to protect the civilians and not to terrorise them.Anyhow even if we accept the bitter truth that because of presence of such black laws such human rights violation are prevalent and unavoidable ( preferred diplomatic term being 'collateral damage' ).
We may hate it,but they are there anyways and we cant do much about it except raise awareness and protest till govt curbs them and army punishes the guilty.
Now what if army misbehaviour extends to a place where there is no such black laws imposed?What then?What should be our reaction in that case?It is unexpected yes!
But,yet it happens all the same and is sad as well as terrifying as we will soon find out.
I was 19yrs old then.I had just given my FYB.com exams and was heading to my hometown for vacations.I had travelled many times on the Dadar-Ghy express previously so I thought I could travel alone.Moreover,I have been trained for years in tae-kwon-do at school,and always carried a pocket knife for self defence,so I was confident enough to travel alone.Besides my earlier journey on this train have been pleasant so fear was the last thing on my mind.

However,this time I had a problem.I had reservations only uptil Satna and beyond that my ticket was on waiting list.I still had enough confidence that I could ask the TT to adjust a seat for me,cos I had observed it happen many times in my previous travels.The TT usually allots empty seats to those having RAC/waiting list tickets.So,I was pretty confident that I could get a seat beyond Satna during the journey.So,till Satna life was pretty comfortable.
However,when we reached Satna somebody woke me up asking for his seat.My reservation had ended!Since I was in the middle berth,I climbed down to the lower seat and sat on its edge.The occupant of the lower berth was awake and he knew prior that my reservation would end in Satna.He was a boy around my age and travelling alone too.He saw my discomfort and offered me half of his seat.He was willing to share.I found it to be a very sweet and kind gesture.

Meanwhile I noticed that many army people had got up in that particular station and our compartment was filled with army people.It was past 3am,and very sleepy now I took up this boy's offer and curled myself lying at one corner of his seat and fell asleep.He also curled himself to give me enough space.The position was quite weird as my legs greeted his face and vice versa in that narrow lower berth.
However,I was very grateful to him for having parted with half his seat with no sight of any TT yet for me do any seat adjusting anywhere else.Meanwhile an army person now sat at the edge of that same seat near over my head.Crushed for space I felt very uncomfortable but I didnot want to argue with him as it was quite obvious that he too didnot have a reservation and had just got up in that train.There were many army people in that compartment around 20 or so and they had around 5 reserved seat amongst them.Rest of them just sat anywhere they got place,like the one who sat near my head.

It was soon morning I got up early to wash myself.The army man still sat on that same place observing my movements.I noticed 2 more army men sitting on the edge of the side berths in that compartment.The rest of the army men had positioned themselves in similar manner in the rest of the seats in that bogie.After I washed and came back I noticed that the army man had made himself quite comfortable in the tiny space which I had occupied.So I had to squeeze myself in that narrow space left and then sat down ( the army man's shoulder/arms touching mine occasionally ).I must admit I was quite scared to object that he had occupied so much space when I had gone to wash.
Moreover,that seat was not mine either so I decided to keep quiet.As I sat quietly the armyman started asking me questions.He was bit drunk and smelt of alchohol.Normally I've always admired the army so I didnot mind answering his questions like what my name was,where I was going,where I studied,my hobbies,family etc etc.His questions didnt seem to end and I was getting tired of replying.

So,picking a magazine I flipped through its pages pretending to read.The army man would ask some thing and I would simply nod my head hoping that he take the cue that I was not interested in talking anymore.He then asked me what relation I had with the boy who was still sleeping in his corner.I remained quiet.He then said something which implied that I had something illicit with the boy as I had slept in the same seat as his and the armyman had noticed it earlier.Clearly irritated now with his nosy behaviour I told him that the boy was my brother.

It was a lie obviously,and I dont know why I said it.I didnot want this armyman to think that I was travelling alone.When I said that the boy was my brother the army man let out a chuckle and said brother and sisters dont share seat like that.I was so angry by then that I wanted to punch and smash his grin right off his face.
However,one look at his rifle reminded me that he was from the army and that he could do anything.The two other army men had joined in the conversation and this armyman started making crude jokes with them something on the likes of 'din mei bhaya,raat mei saiya' kinda stuff referring to me.They all laughed.And he even took my name over and over in his jokes with them.Whatever respect I had for the army instantly vanished when I saw these guys started to pass cheap comments like 'Humko bhi bhaya bana le.'etc.I controlled my anger and didnot react to them.The boy had got up,and I told him that these armymen were disturbing nonstop and also that I told them that he was my brother.The boy told me to ignore them altogether.As the journey continued I ordered breakfast and tea.The armyman would lean towards me again and again trying to brush his shoulders against mine.Once he suddenly placed his hand on my thigh and asked me if I wanted more tea.I politely refused and made quick a movement so that he removed his hand.I was so uncomfortable with him staring at me all the time.

There were two other boys sitting in the opposite berth to where I sat.I asked one of them if I could take their window seat for sometime.They allowed,so thanking them I quickly went over to their side.I then started chatting with them.I soon found out that they both worked in bollywood as assistant to a famous choreographer.
Seeing me laughing and talking to them these army guys started raising their voices and almost caught and hit one of them.

There was a big commotion as the other army men had also gathered as they tried to stop their friends.They most definately were drunk.For a moment things had got really tense.They were also taking my name aloud.I dont know what the heck their problem was.The bollywood guy told me that he had been observing these army people's behaviour for quite long time and saw how they tried to lean and touch but he didnot want to interfere.Since I was now sitting on their window seat,he told me to stay there and also that since they had 2 reserved seats I could use one ( the middle one )while they both will share the other seat.I was so relieved.Immediately we became like best buddies.We shared lunch and played cards.He showed me his photo albums with him posing with all the top stars.I was very impressed and generally had a good time talking to them.The army guy meanwhile went to the seat behind us and started talking to a family.He kept pointing out to me saying cheap things to them about me.Fed up,I ignored him totally.

However,after some time the 3 army guy got up onto the upper berth opposite ours and sat looking down at us,again passing dirty remarks loudly.And not just that,they had packets of peanuts & popcorn with them,which they started throwing at us.Everyone present saw these antics of the army people but everyone was afraid to tell them anything directly.The army men would directly throw the peanuts at my face and clothes targetting specifically me.One or two peanut hit the boy sitting next to me as well.He knew that these army guys were troubling so much,however he adviced me to ignore them and not react as it could turn dangerous.Armed army men could do anything.
As evening approached their peanuts perhaps finished because they continued to stare from above passing cheap remarks or singing suggestive songs.At night I had taken the middle berth.Right after a quick dinner I went up the berth to sleep.The others had also retired to their seats except the army men who had all gathered in our compartment chatting in loud voices.Though it was the hot month of June I still wrapped a bedsheet around me and tried to sleep.Tired as I was I fell asleep.At night I suddenly woke to someone touching my butt.I was sleeping facing the wall.Someone's hand was touching me again and again and I soon realised that it was intentional and not an accidental brushing.Sleepily I looked over my shoulder and to my horror I saw that same army guy hovering over my seat.He was the one touching me.I was terrified.I didnot know how to react.The other army guys were no longer there.Only this army guy stood by my seat.I curled myself as far away as I could towards the wall.For some minutes nothing happened and I was falling asleep again.But suddenly the hand again touched my butt,this time grabbing hard from behind.With a shriek I turned to the other side facing the army guy.'Dont disturb me!'I nearly screamed at him.I was so scared.After some time he went.Rest of the night though I was feeling very sleepy I forced myself to stay awake.Towards morning slowly I did fall asleep.

Next morning again I saw the army guy staring at me with that 'particular' gaze that would make a person feel very uncomfortable.Moreover,I remembered what he had done the previous night.I gave him a disgusted and angry look.Another one of his army friend tried to talk to me that day,but,I simply looked outside the window ignoring him and didnot answer anything that he was asking me.I remained looking outside the window most of the time rest of the day.It was much later in the evening to my relief,that all these army guys finally got down at Jalpaiguri station.
Thus my ordeal was over at last.I had never expected this kind of behaviour from the army people.I had always thought that army people are the most disciplined lot and would always protect the civilians.I had highest respect for them.However,these group of army men specially the ones mentioned behaved worse than road-side eve-teasers.They literally made life hell for other passengers,and especially me.They were all in the age group of late twenties,so their behaviour was just horrible.I was quite young then and whatever good impression I had of the army till then,went out of the window after witnessing and tolerating their antics.And all this happened in the distance between Satna in MP and Jalpaiguri in WB.There is no black laws in this region yet they harrassed the common citizens.One can only wonder what would be the situation in the AFSPA imposed regions where they have a free hand to do anything without being answerable to anyone.See an example below :

INDIA: Violence by the BSF at Murshidabad, West Bengal

So I believe those protesting naked manipuri women.I believe those kashmiri women who beat their chests cursing at the very sight of the army.I know that it is possible.However,I donot support their call for freedom from India.
Though I would support their call for freedom from injustice.So that the offending army men gets appropriate punishment.What happened to me was years ago.Though it couldve been far worse.I feel I was very lucky in the first place to find someone who gave away their reserved seat to me.On that entire journey there was no TT either,so it could have been more horrible.

So,I thank God that he somehow protected me throughout that 3 day long journey.However,the remembrance of that incident still send a chill down my spine and also a big realisation that monsters do lurk within the indian army!
Disclaimer though that this article hasnt been written with intention to malign the indian army in any manner.
ND acknowledges that the indian army has done enough good and selfless service to this nation.This has been just a personal experience which shook her trust in the army.Which however does not imply that the whole army should be judged by this one stray incident.
Every institutions has good or bad so does the army.And just like in every institution there is a provision to try and punish the guilty so should the army have such provisions to bring the guilty into the reins of law.No one should be above the law including the army.