STOP, HE SAID

"Tumi..." his voice, a mere whisper, as he questioned and I could only gaze at his so irresistibly familiar brandy coloured eyes that were locked into mine for what seemed like an eternity, neither of us able to tear away, time seemed to have stopped, and I knew instinctively that this was a mistake so I had to get away...as fast as I could; but, I was held captive, by his eyes - he was still so attractive and his evening stubble made him look ever so more endearing, I never felt this way in a long long time.

A cough, I was so grateful, someone had coughed; and finally, he looked away towards where the sound was coming from...did someone notice us and had coughed intentionally... I didn't know nor I wanted to find out, because, all I knew was I simply had to leave - run infact, far away from there ~ so I turned on my heels and started walking fast ~ blindly almost to wherever my feet would take me - I didn't care, I just kept walking not wanting to hear the 'stop' he said, from behind that I was sure, I heard.

I could not stop, not now...with all kinds of feelings pouring out from within; feelings I had thought were long dead...I had to get away fast and as though my feet had suddenly grown wings I fled towards the bus I could see at a distance through my now blurry-visioned eyes, where did the tears come from all of a sudden, I was angry at myself, as streams of it seemed to have been unleashed and started pouring down my cheeks.

I got up the first bus I saw, not fully sure where it was headed - I'd figure it out later, I thought to myself ~ for getting out of there was most important now and I was glad the bus was slowly starting to move while I was totally unware what had happened behind; that he had hurriedly ushered his folks into a cab and was instructing the driver to follow the bus.

I took the tissues out and wiped the tears off my cheeks ~ oh what an embarrasement, these, I thought, sniffing into the white tissues that I then crumpled into my hands and looked out the bus window where I sat... grateful it had moved out quite a distance now, only to see a cab slowly approaching it and driving parallel by its side; and he, he looked out of his passenger side window trying to get hold of my attention with his lips mouthing a 'stop' - no, my mind screamed, I couldnot stop, not now, not ever.

I shut the window and tried not to look out anymore; not at him...he had asked to stop, and I would never do it - stopping meant disaster ~ for my heart, for him...for his family ...so many lives were involved; stopping meant unlocking something that was long dead - or perhaps, not so dead after all - considering all the emotions I was going through... I prayed for the bus to speed up, and thankfully, once it crossed the channel and got to the highway it did indeed, leaving the cab far behind, and him, slowly instructing the driver ~ a new address.



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